Panic

I found out today, much to my surprise, that when I get panicked or upset, other people think I'm yelling.

Twice I had security staff people tell me not to yell at them because it wasn't their fault that all my plans for a well presented program was going down the drain just because noone would open the darn door!

In fact, I was not blaming them. I did not think I was yelling them. I was just trying to impress on them the importance of finding the person who held the keys. I was also trying to express my frustration with the concept that just because the pass list says the programs starts at 1:30 this does not mean the door doesn't have to be opened before then. And that all the set up is done because there are tables in chairs in the room. What is meant by a 1:30 start is that the inmates should be in their chairs and I should start lecturing at 1:30. NOT that they should be called out of their buildings at 1:30 p.m. and I want to start the program at 1:45. It also does not mean I have no other set up to do.

And there is NOTHING like trying to impress this upon co-workers while important people from the Attorney General's Office are there as guest speakers and they've shown up 2 hours early. Nothing like it at all.

So I wasn't yelling. I was just expressing my panic.

Fortunately, the door was opened at 1:15. I did get set up real fast and in a hurry by 1:30 and the inmates were all in place by 1:40.

The bad part was that the curriculm called for the speakers to speak last, but the lady who recruited them didn't understand that and they were all looking to be out of there by 2:00 p.m. They left around 3:30.

But it was a good class. I think the inmates got a lot out of it and I'm looking forward to Thursday's class which should go a lot smoother.